Movies NOT To See: April 2013 Edition

 

The Place Beyond the Pines (March 29/13)

Ryan Gosling for me, Bradley Cooper for you, very tempting.  Looks like it could be a good movie, but it’s not a theatre movie for me.  I think its one of those movies you watch in bed and say “It was okay.” But I wouldn’t mind checking it out some day.

Room 237 (March 29/13)

A movie about the movie The Shinning.  Apparently we are still struggling to understand hidden meanings in the film.

Mental (March 29/13)

Im sure there is a laugh or two but other than that not worth it.

Wrong (March 29/13)

I could not even finish the preview I was so annoyed.  It is trying too hard at being funny and indie, bleh!

Evil Dead (April 5/13)

A remake of an old horror movie.  I don’t think horror movie previews are suppose to be funny.  This is one of those movies you go to the theatre to have a fun night out and a few sad laughs.

Trance (April 5/13)

A group of people use hypnosis to try and find out what a criminal has done with a painting, but end up messing with his mind and his memories and making him do things for them.  Unfortunately I’m not wowed.  Maybe after theatres.

42 (April 12/13)

A baseball movie… I didn’t even need to read the full description or watch a preview to know NEXT!

To the Wonder (April 12/13)

I love Rachel McAdams, but this looks like a bit of a snoozefest.

Antiviral (April 12/13)

An intriguing concept, but at the same time really weird.  Despite everything it looks like its done in a way that may be slow and kind of boring.  Plus I look away for every needle scene in every movie or show, so I will be looking away for the majority of the movie.  Not for me.

It’s A Disaster (April 12/13)

You almost had me with Julia Stiles.  It was everything else that you lost me on.

Scary Movie 5 (April 19/13)

I use to love these movies.  Unfortunately, its a little late to jump on the paranormal activity band wagon and looks lame.

jOBS (April 19/13)

It pains me a little to put this movie on the NOT to see.  The film is about Apple, which I love, and the creation of the company.  What really upsets me is the fact that Ashton Kutcher is in the film.  He has the same look and the same character in every movie.  Yeah Punk’d is great, but is he really necessary?  P.s.  I like the small j in jOBS, like the small i in iPod/iPhone/iPad etc.

The Lords of Salem (April 19/13)

I thought it was interesting that this actresses last name was Zombie, until the preview told me the movie was by Rob Zombie.  The film looks like a total bust to me.  You would have to do a lot of work to convince me to watch this.  This is one of those straight to Netflix movies that you painfully watch and go ugh! I’m glad thats over.

Kon-Tiki (April 19/13)

Apparently April 19th is a bad day for movies.  Kon-Tiki is kind of like Life of Pi mixed with Jaws and subtitles.  Not so much.

Mud (April 26/13)

Not too sure about this one.  I think its going to be one of those movies that is just okay but not worth the time.

Pain & Gain (April 26/13)

Based on a true story about steroid junky body builders who plot kidnapping, extortion and murder.  Stars Mark Walhberg and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.  Not really my type of movie.  I guess if you have a thing for Mark Walhberg or the Rock there are lots of shirtless scenes haha

At Any Price (April 26/13)

As nice as it is to look at Zac Efron, you lost me at the farming and race cars.

The Numbers Station (April 26/13)

I couldn’t even make it through the whole 2minute trailer.  Yawn.

Midnight’s Children (April 26/13)

Almost had me with this one.  Instead of reading the book or watching the movie, I just want you to tell me what happens.

The Reluctant Fundamentalist (April 26/13)

Interesting story and from a different point of view.  I don’t think I will be seeing this anytime.

Filly Brown (April 26/13)

The preview for the movie keeps you holding on because you just want to see the girl sing.  It doesn’t give you that, and I’m assuming that is because thats all this movie has going for it.

Before Midnight (May 24/13)

I never saw the first movie, it looked pretty boring, so I’m not about to watch the second.

The Bling Ring (June 14/13)

Based on the true events of the group who stole over 3 million in stuff from celebs like Paris Hilton, Orlando Bloom and Rachel Bilson.  I wouldn’t see this in theatres, but I do like Emma Watson.

Maniac (June 21/13)

Elijah Wood definitely looks like a creeper.  Unfortunately, its not too far off from his usual look.  A gory, creepy, horror/thriller.  These creep me out, so I’m putting it on NOT to see, but I imagine many of you will want to.  I don’t think it will be any good though.

The Heat (June 28/13)

I love Sandra Bullock, and I could see myself having some laughs during this movie, but its not doing much for me right now.

Pacific Rim (July 12/13)

Alien robots that come out from the ocean.  Good graphics but not for me.

The World’s End (Aug 23/13)

A lame drinking movie.  The poster teases you thinking it will be something magical and fun.  What a waste.

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