Movies NOT To See: June 2017 Edition

A compiled list to help you weed out the good vs the bad to save your time, money and brain cells. A link to the trailer has been provided in the title. 

Obviously if your familiar with this title due to your children you fate it already sealed but there is still hope for the rest of us.
Rarely are horror movies ever worth seeing in the theatre and this one makes no exception.
I never actually got into Tupac and I assure you I probably never will.  I have no interest in this and while you may argue because of your own personal interest you will watch it and you will rave about it because you like Tupac, then a week later you will not even remember that you saw it.
A remake of the original Eastwood classic of the same name. While I do like the actors/actresses in this movie, it is basically a wounded soldier who ends up at a girls school during the Civil War and all the girls young and old are smitten and begin to fight.
A girl tries to escape to Mexico but is caught by Cannibals, then she goes to Coachella.  Not really, but it seems a reasonably description for this mess.
I happen to like Ansel Elgort and he looks adorable in this movie which is in contrast to his bad ass crime driving.  It also stars Kevin Spacey and actually looks like a decent movie, but the story is old and tired which cancels out anything it had going for it.  Maybe when it’s on Netflix.
The 300th remake of the same movie yet somehow we will all watch this when it comes onto Netflix.
I dislike Will Ferrell…. He has an obnoxious comedic value and while I appreciate his attempt to movie into the adult comedy films resembling the likes of Paul Rudd, he still manages to keep enough of himself to make this a no go.
While there may be funny parts in this movie, the whole idea just doesn’t make sense.  It relies on the fact that the women are nuns and the men are priests and the comedy comes from the severe contrast of their actions and their appearance/setting.

Movies To See: April 2016 Edition

Movies TO See.  A compiled list to help you weed out the good vs the bad to save your time, money and brain cells. A link to the preview has been provided in the title. 

Before I Wake (April 8)

I don’t like horror movies because I scare too easily, but since Jamie likes to watch them I might as well have the opportunity to pick some decent ones.  A family adopts a boy who has a unique ability for his dreams to become a reality, but his nightmares become all too real.

Hardcore Henry (April 8)

I’m not entirely sold on this movie, but it has an interesting perspective that is not common in movies.  The film is an action, killing and gory film all from the first person perspective.  Everything is filled from the viewpoint of Henry, you see his hands, legs and whatever else he sees which makes it a bit disorienting but unique enough to peek my interest.

The Boss (April 8)

Oy vey!  One of the wealthiest women in the world, played by Melissa McCarthy, is sent to prison for insider trading and loses everything.  She moves in with her assistant (Kristen Bell) and starts a new empire involving young girl groups to sell brownies and teach them business.  Looks like it could be full of laughs, don’t let us down Melissa.

Mr. Right (April 8)

Ugh, I hate myself for putting this movie on the TO see list.  The movie really doesn’t look that great and I know for a fact I won’t love it in the end but I still would watch it?  The film was shown at the TIFF in September 2015 and is being released in theatres and on iTunes April 8th.

Barbershop: The Next Cut (April 15)

I’ve never seen the first two movies, but I imagine they are very much the same.  Not theatre material but perhaps Netflix.  I must admit that it was Eve and Nicki Minaj that really swayed me for this one.

The Jungle Book (April 15)

Loves me some Disney.  The Jungle Book was never my favourite film growing up and I’m not sure how I will feel about this one but it a must see.  It will be interesting with the live action aspect for sure.

Colonia (April 15)

Inspired by true events of a young couple, played by Emma Watson and Daniel Bruhl, who get swept up in the Chilean military coup of 1973 when Daniel is abducted by the secret police.  Lena (Emma Watson) joins the cult in order to try to locate Daniel and escape.  Not usually my type of film but I love Emma Watson and could be a very well done film.  Available in theatres and on iTunes April 15th.

The Huntsman: Winter’s War (April 22)

I loved the first Huntsman film and I am so looking forward to this.  It’s called the story before Snow White.  Charlize Theron makes a great evil queen. Threatened by her sister’s (Emily Blunt) daughter, Theron kills the daughter unleashing a power within her sister.  She basically turns into Elsa from Frozen and builds an army to fight her sister.  Also starring Chris Hemsworth as the Huntsman and Jessica Chastain.

Elvis & Nixon (April 22)

The story behind one of the most requested photographs in the National Archives of Elvis and Nixon.  Just reading this description I wouldn’t have thought I would want to see this movie, but after watching the trailer and seeing the cast it turns out it could be a pretty humorous adventure.

The Tale of Tales (April 22)

A magical film shown at the 2015 Cannes film festival is being released for our viewing pleasure.  Many strange things to see but it looks so fantastically fantasy based that I have to choice but to watch this one.

The Meddler (April 22)

Marnie (Susan Sarandon) moves closer to her daughter (Rose Byrne) to bestow her motherly advice.  When her daughter won’t take her advice, Marnie chooses to pass it on to anyone and everywhere she meets.  Sounds annoying but looks oddly cute and charming.

Ratchet and Clank (April 29)

Based on the video game of the same name comes an animated film with action, adventure and humour.  Nothing I would rush to the theatres to see but it looks cute enough to entertain the thought of watching.

Mother’s Day (April 29)

A star studded film which could be a hit or miss, usually these don’t turn out to be amazing, but they include so many famous people that you just have to watch them!

Movies NOT To See: November 2014 Edition

It has been quite awhile since I posted one of these as I was focusing on other projects. It has actually been so long that my list of movies NOT to see has gone and died many months ago.

I decided it was time to do this again, as we actually had to sit and try to decide what movie to go to, then ended up NOT GOING!  Unheard of.  Which of course is due to the UNDERwhelming amount of must see movies right now.  So let us begin.


ABC’s of Death 2 (Oct 31/14)

Just in time for Halloween.  A conglomeration of directors and stories of ways to die, with elements of horror, fantasy and outrageous attempts at comedy.  This is a Netflix movie that even then I am not sure I would watch.

Open Windows (Nov 7/14)

Starring Elijah Wood playing a creepy stalker, this seems to be the only type of role that suits him, other than a hobbit.  No thank you.

Foxcatcher (Nov 14/14)

As much as we are willing to pay to watch anything that involves Channing Tatum, I’m sorry to say that this does not interest me.

Rosewater (Nov 14/14)

I think we see enough of this on tv and all over the internet.  I don’t need to pay to watch dramatizations of violence.

Penguins of Madagascar (Nov 26/14)

I recall seeing the first film but I had not bothered with the 7 other variations that came after.  Completely for young children and their families.  Also for the elderly.  The film is 40 minutes long, which seems more likely for a made for TV DVD extra than a full length film.  Sorry, but no thank you.

Wild (Dec 5/14)

Based on the best selling book.  I never cared to read the book and I wouldn’t bother watching the movie to save time from reading the book either.  Sorry Reece Witherspoon.

Exodus: Gods and Kings (Dec 12/14)

We all know the story of Moses.  The only reason to watch it is because it looks pretty cool, but I have an issue with watching things I have already seen.

Inherent Vice (Dec 12/14)

Bleh.  I could not even make it through the whole trailer.  Starring Joaquin Phoenix playing the same odd wack-a-doo character he always does.

Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb (Dec 19/14)

I never really watched the first one so I can’t really be excited or interested in these.

Annie (Dec 19/14)

Another remake of Annie, but to mix things up we make her african american and turn Jamie Foxx into the next Dwayne Johnson.

The Interview (Dec 25/14)

When rich actors have too much time and too much money… they make movies.

Unbroken (Dec 25/14)

An inspiring movie about the life of Olympian and war hero Louis Zamperini.  Sorry Louis, I have better things to do on Christmas day than to pay to fall asleep in a theatre.

Big Eyes (Dec 25/14)

I like Amy Adams and Christoph Waltz but I don’t see myself sitting through this movie and enjoying it.

American Sniper (Dec 25/14)

War movie starring Bradley Cooper.  Next…

Amityville (Jan 2/15)

Another Amityville horror movie film, but not a remake.  Instead it is set in the “present” but has pretty much the same events.

Predestination (Jan 9/15)

Time travel assassins.  Stopping crime before it happens.  Very reminiscent of Looper and Minority Report.  Both of which I enjoyed, but why watch this one when I have already seen them?

Paddington (Jan 16/15)

I enjoy the fact that it is set in London, and the house is cute but you lost me at animated bear.  Definitely for the fun family night out.

Hot Tub Time Machine 2 (Feb 20/15)

My skills are so good I don’t even have to watch the preview to know this will not be worth the time or effort.

Home (March 27/15)

Animated cuteness…gone bad.